Archive for Events of life

Semi random blurt #03

There is a saying that goes: “There is nothing new under the sun” which is more or less true depending on how harsh you are with defining what’s new. This saying will have importance to this SRB.

I think it was back in 08-09 it all happened. I was going to create one of my first original characters (don’t steal ‘kay!(will use the term OC from now on, to be more like the cool kids)). You might already now where this story is going but please keep reading anyway. The reason this was going to be a big deal, at least for me at the time was the fact that it was for a RPG forum. I think it was called “Desert world” or something along those lines. It was going to be my first “public” OC and not only that, I would have to role-play it.

From the start I was suffering from illusions of grandeur, my ambition was to create a totally original OC that was going to become famous on the forum, a main protagonist of sorts. A Wolverine to the X-MEN/Marvel universe. Even if Wolverine isn’t the protagonist of everything or even a main player, everybody knows of him. I wanted to create my own Wolverine. So as I said, my ambitions were high. But as with all great tales (not really) it was doomed to fail from the very start.

My character was going to have the ability to cancel out other peoples abilities, he was going to be an orphan due to murdered family but survived by luck, be happy go-lucky but with a dark past (see what was written before the last comma) and he was going to have a evil creature bound to his body. See, only original traits… at least I thought I was original while creating him.

As I was making the most groundbreaking OC ever seen by this cruel, cruel world I looked through characters that other people had made, to see my “competition” and get inspiration. Whilst going through some characters I stumbled up on a character which had almost the exact same background story, though powerless and whiteout an evil entity tied to his body. But this shattered my innocent mind. I was a rip-off! I was not the creator of a superbly unique OC. I was at most mediocre. This made me sad, very sad and ashamed. So ashamed that I quite the forum without even finishing my character.

So what is the point of this story? For me it was to realize that I ain’t unique and special even though my mother says so. It was also when I realized that no matter what I make, there will be similarities with other things, that came before or which will be created at the same time. And it is something we just have to accept. ‘Cause even if something isn’t completely 100% original, that doesn’t mean it’s bad. If you are making a stereotype, just make sure to make it in to YOUR stereotype and be proud and happy that you made something. Originality comes with practice and time, we need to stumble and fall a few times before we can create the real OC’s.

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Semi random blurt #02

The day before yesterday, while minding my own business, I died a little on the inside from panic.

The incident occurred just half an hour before I was supposed to be at work. Before it happened everything was just normal. I was in a good mood, the cereals had been just the right amount of crunchy and I had a few minutes to just lie around before heading off to work. So to indulge in the laying around I decided to play some games on my phone, which was when the ball dropped.

I am sure that my whole being stopped for a few seconds, when I saw that my credit card was missing from the phone case. With eyes wide open I just starred at the “pocket” which was lacking in credit cards, my mind blank except for a building wail of terror, doom and panic.

When the wail finally took over my mind I started to realize all the problems this would cause.

  1. I didn’t have any cash on me nor could I take out some. My economical power would be zero if the card was gone.
  2. I didn’t have anything to eat at work and my plan was to buy something during lunch, which if we look to point 1 was impossible.
  3. If someone had stolen it I would probably be a lot poorer and I also wasn’t sure about where to call to “block”(?(there must be a better word/term for this)) the card from further usage.
  4. I needed to come up with a solution to all of these within 20 minutes.

19:59

19:58

Found on the interwebs, not my own creation

Shit hit the fan

Luckily I didn’t give in to panic… not totally at least. (I might have cried on the inside a little)

I managed to retread my steps from the day before and figure out where my credit card could have gone missing, a la Sherlock Holmes. Then I did a quick recon of the fridge and found some food for lunch, in case of card being lost forever. With some back up food and self calming I threw myself in to the car and raced to the only place where I could have logically lost it, the grocery store!

As you might have guessed, I got it back and even got to work on time. In the end, everything turned out better than expected.

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Semi random blurt #01

When bored or just going about my everyday life I often whistle. It brightens, not just my mood, but the mood in the room/space I find myself in at the moment. So when in doubt, whistle. When I whistle it is most often this melody:

that pops up in to my head and makes it way out through my pursed lips.

It makes everything more enduring and more light hearted, my troubles just disappear (not really, but it feels like it). But I don’t always whistle the “Andy Griffith Show” them song (that’s what’s it called apparently, but for me it will always be Molly’s’ tune (Long live Scrubs)). I have another tune I often whistle and that tune is what made me write this post.

The reason is that I just a few days ago started questioning where it came from, I had always whistle that tune, it was my default tune, the most basic of tunes, it was the essences of my whistling and I couldn’t figure out if it was a melody created by myself or if I was something already in existence. It bothered me. If it was a tune of my own creation, I certainly had to write it down since it was so easy going and relaxing, but if it wasn’t I needed to know where it came from. What finally made me realize the songs origin, very appropriately so, was a few raindrops falling upon me.

It was the beginning of the “Singing in the Rain” song (specifically the part between 0:47-0:55, I just keep looping that part). So with some disappointment I realized I would not be the creator of catchy tune (as of yet) but it gave me a new head scratcher. Why is my default tune the beginning of “Singing in the Rain”? I’ve never seen the movie, nor have I ever heard the original performance of the song, at least that I know of… quite the mystery.

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Thoughts on things concerning play I think

The day before yesterday at a relatives birthday party I was speaking with a older second cousin. This cousin had her brought her children to celebratory gathering. They were 7 and 9 I believe and was playing on their Ipad a bit during the party. Anyway, this second cousin said that she thought it was funny that her children was playing with marbels. Just as she had done when she was a child. (I was about to write balls, which might have been fun, but then I decide to check for the correct translation)

The second cousin’s mother said that is was good that they were playing with marbles. Since she had also done so herself when young (so did I). But it got me thinking. Why was it that they thought it was so excellent to play with marbles?

Was it because the children had to be outside while doing it? Was it because they had saved their old marbel collections and and now the children could make sure that they were not gathering dust on some attic? Maybe it was because they, the grown ups, knew what marbels was and how to play with them so it created some kind of common connection between young and old?

I would guess it has a lot to do with the last one, naturally that is probably not the only reason, but I think it might be the main reason. Parents want to connect with their offspring and what better way than to do it through play? When playing, everyone becomes just another player, yes some might be more experienced players, but whilst playing you leave other rolles behinde. It is the same thing when I am playing cards with my grandmother. I do not think about our relation outside of the game while playing, neither is she. We just play and have a good time.

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Spooky stuff

Last night I had a dream. In it I went to the grocery store and as I came to the check out and was about to pay, my mind went blank. I snapped out of it when the cashier asked me to input my code. But I could not. I just stood there and had some numbers that were not correct floating around in my head. I started to cry and ran from there without my groceries and tried to call home but I could not remember the number, then I woke up. But the most scary part was that when I was awake I still could not remember my own phone number, which is normaly so ingrained in my brain that I can say it at any moment, no matter what I do. Even when I was finaly abel to “remember” it, it was not the right number, it was almost the right number. So I had to check in my phone what the actual number was.

It was spooky and mind tearing.

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Doors

What is a door? It is a entrance and divider into certain areas.

Why do we have doors? To have a filter, a gate, a way to stop certain things to enter or leave.

We all have doors.

Sometimes the number of doors grow and sometime they shrink.

We also have keys. Keys are for opening doors.

Every person you met are give a key. Some keys are nothing more than a prop, since they cannot open any doors. But most keys can at least open one or two of your doors.

I have been afraid of giving out keys or giving out keys leading to dead ends or nasty places.

This I regret, profundly. Since it has hurt people dear to me.

Now I am standing here, waiting for those who have been hurt, with a master key in hand.

Ready to entrust it to someone important.

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Story: In le flower shop

I have worked in a flower shop a little. There I worked as a cashier, which have given me a new perspective on life and also loads of more respect for people working in stores.

One day, it was just a regular day at the store, not a busy day. I had just come back from lunch, it was a little bit empty in the store at the moment. So I was just casually daydreaming about what to do in my free time, when a man walks up to me. This man has a few roses with him. He puts them on the counter and says to me “Don’t you have any other flowers?”

I reply “What kind of flowers?”

He “Well, some other roses, these look kind of sad don’t you think?” while at the same time squeezing the bud on one rose. “They look a little wilted and dry.”

Me [short silence] “You do know that those aren’t real flowers, don’t you?”

He became silent briefly, as if to ponder what had just happend. “They aren’t? Do you have some real roses?”

Me “Yes, just go in through the sliding door over there.”

He came back with real roses the next time.

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